A Window To Your Character By Jim Kuiken ![]()
“I HATE violence, more than most, for I have seen it. But I will visit its full wrath upon you without blinking an eye if you attempt to harm me, my family, the innocent, or my country.” James Kuiken
Here’s another quick note in the “Getting to Know You” series. To me, a person’s favorite quotes tell me a lot about that person’s beliefs and character. Here are some of my favorite quotes, and even a couple of my own – which I wrote as responses to a specific event or thought. I wanted to share them with you (again), especially now. Many of my friends, family and acquaintances tend to see me as a hard-core, military, law enforcement, no bull$#!+ kind of guy. I always like to say that I will be as nice and peaceful as someone will let me be. In general, I am a happy, optimistic, accepting, helping, quiet kind of guy with a huge sense of humor. Not everyone gets my sense of humor, but trust me, it’s there… Here are some of the quotes that people tend to think are my basic core – and although they do describe my beliefs (and actions), they are generally in reaction to something or someone. The quotes towards the end of this list are actually my real core – the way I am when allowed to be that way. “The Spartans do not ask how many are the enemy but where are they.” Plutarch This is how a lot of folks see me…aggressive, seeking out the enemy. Well…sometimes that’s true, if people (individuals and/or groups) don’t treat me or mine the way they should. i.e., as described in this next quote. “I won’t be wronged. I won’t be insulted. I won’t be laid a-hand on. I don’t do these things to other people, and I require the same from them.” John Wayne That’s how people should treat each other. Respect, for the person and their beliefs / lifestyle, as long as they give that same respect in return. If not… “down these mean streets a man must go who is not himself mean, who is neither tarnished nor afraid…” Raymond Chandler This is one of my favorites, often quoted by Frank Regan (Tom Selleck) on ‘Bluebloods’, and that sentiment is why I was in the military, and a law enforcement officer/agent for most of my adult life. I’ve always felt a deep sense of duty to help and protect those in need, those not respected, and those who are unable to defend themselves. As said on another of my favorite shows, the ‘Jesse Stone’ series (also Tom Selleck) “did I ever tell you that you have a hyper-developed sense of responsibility?” “I HATE violence, more than most, for I have seen it. But I will visit its full wrath upon you without blinking an eye if you attempt to harm me, my family, the innocent, or my country.” James Kuiken This is one of the quotes I wrote, in response to one of the many incidents and/or threats in the recent past. There have been so many that I don’t remember which one it was – but it was probably a foreign terrorist group. Much like this response I posted, when we were told to “minimize our online footprint, for our safety”… As much as I believe these things, and will step up to the line to defend them, myself and others, my real feelings are sometimes a bit more hidden…like all of us. “Even the strongest and bravest must sometimes weep. It shows they have a great heart, one that can feel compassion for others.” Brian Jacques, Redwall I’ve seen some of the toughest, most bad@$$ people on the planet break down and weep for a fallen brother / sister, or the senseless slaughter of innocents, or a horrific accident, fire, etc., that has taken someone’s loved one. Or sometimes, just because of the crushing inhumanity of others. I’ve done it myself, on more occasions than I ever want to remember. “Courage knows no gender. Courage knows no race. Courage comes from within, from a deeply ingrained sense of duty, from service to something bigger than just yourself…from love.” James Kuiken I wrote this one in response to a post about a young soldier that gave her life in defense of her fellow soldiers, trying to save them. She (like most of them) was so very young…and so very selfless. “True strength is shown by the gentle kindness in one’s character.” James Kuiken This one was written in response to a great FB photo posted by Dakota Meyer, which is not only a great image of kindness, but also contains another great quote. And of course, one of my all-time favorites. The one you will see on my website, and at the bottom of all of my emails, etc… It is the one that most captures my ethos, what I truly believe, and try to live by. “What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world remains and is immortal.” Albert Pine I know you have a few – and I’d love to hear them! Drop me a line in the ‘comments’ section, Facebook, Linkedin, or a quick email! And as I’ve said before, if you really want to get to know me, you can just read “I hope you find Peace”. It’s what I wish for you.
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It Was Dark In There! No…Really! By Jim Kuiken ![]() After I got off of active duty with the Marines in January 1977, I headed back “home” to Boise Idaho. I’d been raised as an Air Force brat (my dad, Gerrit Kuiken, who married my mom when I was about two or so was career Air Force), and we never lived anywhere very long, but we always claimed Boise as our home of record. I’d actually been born there (as was my brother) at St. Luke’s hospital. When I first got there, after a short stint in various odd jobs and a year or so as a State Correctional Officer, I finally got my dream job as a Boise City Firefighter / EMT. My father (Bob Rose) was the Deputy Chief there, and his father (Earl Rose) had also been a Boise City Firefighter…so I was a third generation Boise City Firefighter. Even though I was young and strong, and a seasoned Marine combat vet, it was not easy to get on the Department. The written exam was brutal, but they were trying to screen out a lot of folks, because they had over 300 applicants for 3 jobs. And a lot of them were former or current Firefighters trying to get on with Boise – one of the biggest departments around. After the exam I ended up being one of 30 picked to undergo the physical test and screening. I had actually tied with several of the top scorers on the written exam – all of us got 100%, but that didn’t really matter…everyone who made it to the physical test started even all over again. The only use for the written exam score after you made it to the final step was to break any ties on the physical test. During the entire application, examination and testing of the applicants, Bob, knowing that I was applying, made sure that he had nothing to do with that hiring cycle so no one could accuse either of us of any wrongdoing. Also, since we both had different last names, no one knew that Bob and I were related anyway – and neither of us told anyone. ![]() kinda like the Incredible Hulk ... NOT!!! If I thought the written exam was tough, that was nothing compared to the physical test and screening. It lasted several hours (most of the day), and was completely exhausting…carrying 75lbs of hose up and down 10 stories while in full turn-out gear. Going into hot, flaming, smoky rooms on your hands and knees, breathing through your mask and looking for a 150lb dummy to evacuate and carry out. Pulling 75lbs of hose – tied to the end of a rope – hand over hand up a 5 story exterior wall, lowering it back down hand over hand (no sliding it through your gloves), back up the 5 stories, and back down again…destroying your arms, shoulders and upper back… And on, and on… The test is a long story for another time, but in any case, I was completely drained about half-way through the day, and it took all of my determination and drive to just keep pushing through the rest of the day. Like all good physical tests, it was much more mental than physical…unless you’re someone like the Hulk. Finally, I got the word that I was one of the three that got hired, and started my training. After months of training, I was finally at my first station, and still, as the rookie, went through a lot of additional training and some good hearted harassment…all part of a Firefighter’s life. I was in heaven! ![]() I’d been to a few house, car, and grass / field fires, etc., but then it came. We were lying in our bunks upstairs when the beeps and tones started sounding, and one of them set off our station’s bells. By the number of beeps and tones we could hear, we knew they were calling out several stations – it was my first big fire! Nervous and excited, I jumped out of the bunk and ran to the pole, slid down and stepped into my turn-out gear, jumped on the rear running board of the fire engine with my hand through the leather strap, and we were screaming out of the door, sirens blaring. It was about 2 o’clock in the morning, and we could see a glow as we headed downtown…it was a commercial fire. It turns out that it was a multi-story building, with a bar on the ground floor. Someone had emptied the trash into a can, but didn’t see that there was a smoldering cigarette, which lit the fire. Since no one was there, the fire got out of control, and as best we could tell had burned most of the first floor before it set off any alarms. The Battalion Chief was directing the Fire Engines to various locations, we were pulling hose, hooking in hydrants, and putting on our breathing masks. My Captain directed me, as the rookie, to be the nozzle-man on the hose team, and we went in through the back door, crawling forward because there was so much smoke that you couldn’t even see your hand in front of your face. That was lucky, because about half way in, while looking for the fire, my hand met open air instead of floorboards and I almost fell through the huge hole that had burned through a large portion of the floor. We worked around the hole, and then I saw it! If you can see anything in a smoke-filled room, then it’s probably fire or a “hotspot”, so I hit it with a stream of water from my hose…and it seemed to shoot up and away, out of sight! I’d never seen anything like that in any practice fires, but I just kept working until they pulled us back – the fire was out. We’d been in there for a long time, and we were tired and coughing, and started rolling up hose when I saw Bob Rose…the Deputy Chief…and he was not happy. Since it was a major fire, he’d responded, and was now talking to the Battalion Chief, still mad that someone had hit him in the back of the head with a full stream of water, almost knocking him over, and blowing his white (supervisor’s) fire helmet right off his head down into the big hole in the floor, right into the middle of the fire still burning in the basement, destroying the helmet… I couldn’t tell if he was madder about the helmet, or being hit in the back of the head with a full stream from a fire hose… In any case, it really had been dark in there… I kept my mouth shut, and rolled my hose.
Easy – Just Reach Out Your Hand (which isn’t so easy…) By Jim Kuiken ![]()
There are a LOT of folks who need help. In one way or another, I’d say most folks could use some help.
So what’s the solution…everyone stand around with their hand out? Go to the Government expecting “free” help from Big Brother? Or just “quit yer whinin’ and suck it up”? And besides, if everyone needs some help, how are they supposed to help others when they themselves are hurting or in need?
All that may be true, but you can still help, if you want to. Big, horrible events happen frequently. 9/11, Katrina, Orlando, etc. Everyone wants to help during these events…but how about during the mundane grind of daily life and small, personal events? It doesn’t take a lot to help. It doesn’t have to cost money to help. It just takes one person (you) to see a need and reach out your hand. Here’s a quick example. Obviously, I’m a writer…you’re reading my article right now, right? Well, by focusing some of my writing on helping others, and on some rough spots that I’ve been through – and on those who helped me – I’ve been able to help others to recognize that they could get or give some help. I just got this letter (below) this week. “Hello SgtMaj. Kuiken I have been reading your blog for a long time and thank you for your writing and dedication to veterans. I am a Gulf War Combat Vet with (*** unit) and was a (***) Gunner. I followed your story about the effects of PTSD and am now coming to terms with it in my life after all these years. Two divorces and severe chronic fatigue, IBS and Fibromyalgia I am working thorough a claim with the VA. Your story about Freedom and what he has meant to you really hit home for me.
I am being treated by a private Dr for PTSD and am just now getting ready to submit a claim to the VA for my physical injuries I have been experiencing for 25 years, as well as finally coming to terms that I have been suffering the effects of PTSD. I never wanted to admit it out of shame or embarrassment. We Marines are supposed to be the tough guys right?
I tried submitting a claim in 2008 and was denied and just kind of gave up, but my physical issues continued to get worse until I just could not function much at all. When you talk about just not being able to get out of your chair all day, "that's me". I'm 48 now and feel like I'm 98.” (emphasis added by me) Here’s a veteran who served honorably, and has been suffering the effects from combat for over 25 years…and because of me admitting that I had some unresolved issues from combat, and had found help…he was able to break through his shame and embarrassment of not being “tough enough” to just suffer silently, and to ask for help before he joined the ranks of those 8,000+ veterans who commit suicide each year. That’s my cause – exposing and eliminating suicides by the military, veterans, first responders (law enforcement, firefighters, and EMS personnel), and their families and loved ones – i.e., those who have protected and served us, and who are now suffering the effects of that service. I know it’s hard to find the right cause that speaks to you, or the right organization to work with, or get help from. Lots of them are word of mouth, but you still have to do your own research to see if they are legitimate, serve the cause you identify with, and are certified and/or rated to make sure the resources are getting to those in need, not in some crook’s pocket or spent irresponsibly. I still think it’s something everyone can do, whether it’s just referring someone to someone who can help, talking to a friend or family member in need, or connecting with an organization you can identify with. In addition, I’m hoping that in the very near future, I and some friends of mine can help make that a lot easier. Stay tuned for our announcement of our own non-profit organization that will dramatically make all this much easier – finding organizations that you can identify with, that help your cause, or that you can get help from; and to ensure all those organizations are rated and verified – so you are sure the resources are getting to those in need! How can you help today?
Young Pup’s New Trick By Jim Kuiken ![]()
When I first got promoted from a Border Patrol Agent in Calexico California to a Special Agent in Los Angeles, I started from the bottom all over again – which is expected. I did have a leg up on a lot of the new Special Agents, in that I wasn’t just fresh out of college with a degree, with no life experience and thinking that hardship was a two-man dorm room paid for by daddy.
I’d been a combat (wounded) Marine, a State Correctional Officer, a County Sheriff’s Deputy, an INS Detention Officer, and a Border Patrol Agent in some of the roughest areas on the southern border. Plus I did have some college…paid for on my own by working two jobs while I was attending full time… Nevertheless, I paid my dues there in LA by working ACAP (pulling criminal illegal aliens out of jails and prisons and putting them up for deportation), then working my way up to VGTF (violent gang task force, chasing down gang members in the streets of LA, Compton, Westminster, Long Beach, etc.), Fraud (counterfeiting operations, undercover buys, drugs/guns/smuggling, etc.), and even as a supervisor running the TSU (technical surveillance unit, using cameras, vehicle tracking devices, listening devices, etc., to enhance various unit’s surveillance capabilities during operations), and overseeing the District’s training program (pre and post Academy, and as an Academy instructor). I finally got my dream job there in LA, when the District Director (Mac) asked me to help him create and run a specialty unit – Special Investigations Unit. SIU was a composite of all the weird ducks that didn’t fit anywhere else, and were some of the most complicated and dangerous operations…and some that the regular units didn’t want to get involved in. It was eventually comprised of several (former) units that now fell under the SIU umbrella. Some of these were: Fugitive Task Force (high risk fugitives and high risk warrant entries – many of these were violent multiple murderers, etc., wanted by their own countries), Organized Crime Task Force (to locate, disrupt, and arrest organized crime organizations), OCDETF – Organized Crime and Drug Enforcement Task Force (drug smuggling and sales organizations and rings, etc.), JTTF (Joint Terrorism Task Force, assigned to and working with the FBI-led task force on international terrorism and terrorist suspects), as well as Sensitive Investigations…we’ll leave that one alone… Mac allowed me almost total autonomy in the running of the unit, as well as being the only supervisor in all of LA District that was allowed to hand-pick my own agents for the unit. Everyone else got whoever was assigned – and there was a lot of grumbling and ‘politics’ from the other supervisors and section chiefs about that…and the fact that I and my unit didn’t fall under one of the traditional sections, but reported (operationally) directly to Mac. Things got really tense with all the other supervisors and chiefs when I picked some of the agents directly from a couple of Academy classes, not from the pool of more seasoned agents, who all wanted to get into this new “special” unit doing all the cool stuff… I even had one of the other section chiefs complain that my ‘guys’ were irreverent and didn’t show him “proper respect”. My reply was that my ‘guys’ were hand-picked, and were almost all irreverent smart-@$$es, who would give respect to those who earned it. Don’t get me wrong, they were not blatantly disrespectful of authority, but they didn’t bow and kowtow to titles without substance. They were smart-@$$es because they were highly intelligent, independent thinkers, the kind of person I needed to handle the unconventional investigations and operations we dealt with – not plodding ‘yes’ men. But the poo really hit the fan when I brought a new female agent into the team. SIU was comprised of a bunch of units traditionally ‘manned’ by big, tough macho guys working in dangerous situations, watching each other’s backs, and was no place for a girl…and I put her right into the Fugitive Task Force / High Risk Warrant squad! Sacrilege! After some in-service training, she finally got to go out on one of our operations – a fugitive that was wanted in Mexico for killing multiple Federal Police Officers. We had surveillance on his house overnight and knew that he was there, so in the morning we set up a perimeter and had the entry team ready to go. We had to wait until 6am before we could serve the warrant. She was on the outside perimeter team, as far away from the action as possible for her first operation, and like everyone else, as she got more experience, would work her way onto the inner perimeter team, then maybe onto the entry team. About 15 minutes before we were to hit the door, she came over to ask me a question. I always believed in open questions from everyone, up to when we were scheduled to execute the operation, then all questions stopped and everyone did their job as assigned. She had about 5 minutes before that happened. She said “Do we know he’s in there?” We all knew he was, because of the overnight surveillance, so I figured she was backing into her main question. “Yes” I replied. Then she asked “Do we have his phone number?” Again, since we’d done full background and gathered all available intelligence on him and the house, I said “Yes.” She then asked “and we know that his girlfriend and kids are in the house?” I was getting irritated and said “Yes. We don’t have much time, what’s your real question?” “Why don’t we just call him, explain he’s surrounded, and ask him to come out so the kids and his girlfriend aren’t put in danger?” Being a bunch of big macho guys with shields, guns, etc…, we usually just took out the door and went in…it had never occurred to us to just ask… I sent her back to her post, had everyone go on high alert and hold in place, and called him – telling him we’d allow him to come out, wouldn’t destroy his girlfriend’s door, put the kids in danger, etc…and he said “Ok, I’ll be right out”! When he came out of the door, he had his hands empty and raised, we walked him to the side of the house and cuffed him out of sight of his kids, and a very dangerous man was in custody – on his way back to the authorities in Mexico…all because of a young pup with a different perspective teaching some old, salty dogs a new trick. |
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